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Sunday, January 31, 2010

Embarrassing Moments - Part Duex


Many years ago we were camping up in Michigan in our tent camper. Our kids were little at the time. The campsites were pretty close together. The site next to us had their fire pit directly across from where Jim and I slept. We had turned in early, while they were sitting around a campfire. I let out a big, honking snore. Not just a snore, but an all-out tent sides sucking in, hold everything down or it will fly away, SNORT, SNORT, SNORT, kind of snore. It must have scared the bejesus out of our fellow campers because I heard the woman ask her husband in a small voice, "WHAT was THAT?"

"Oh, that's just the people next door!"

At that point I yelled out, "Jim! Wake up! You're SNORING!" (Quick thinking on my part, don't you think?)


When my daughter, Jessica, was little, I used to make her stuffed animals come to life by moving their arms, head, and sometimes legs, all the while talking in a funny voice. I particularly liked talking like Elmo. As Jess grew older, the playing with the stuffed animals stopped, but I never dropped the Elmo voice. Even through high school, I would kid around with her and talk in an Elmo voice. Jessica graduated high school and moved on to college. But I didn't grow older. Nope. One day I called her dorm room, and thinking it was Jess that answered the phone, I did my best Elmo imitation and asked, "Is Jessica there?"

I heard the young woman let out a sigh, and say, "Jessica, it's your MOM!" Then she put the phone down. How she knew it was me, I'll never know because I NEVER did my Elmo imitation outside of the house!


I fell down on the job (literally!) and hurt my knee and had to have an MRI to see what kind of damage was done and what surgery was necessary. I was on crutches and had my knee wrapped up in an ace bandage with those metal clips to hold it together. I was under the impression AND people had told me that no metal was allowed when having an MRI done. I entered the room, and of course there had to be a young, good looking technician working the machine. He instructed me to remove the ace bandage and to slip on a robe. I could keep on my underclothes. I was worried about my underwire bra and thought I should mention it for fear that my boobs would be suddenly magnetically drawn to the top of the machine and I would literally be hanging by my boobs.

With that in mind, I timidly said to this young stud muffin, "Um, I am wearing an underwire bra."

His reply? "I am so happy for you. Now get up on the table, please."

Did I want to die of embarrassment? You betcha!


Anything you'd like to share with us? I'm all ears!





(Click here to read Part One of Embarrassing Moments)

17 comments:

Lynda said...

Funny stories! Life is better than fiction.

Anonymous said...

"Im so happy for you, now get up on the table" lmao...that is priceless;)

Gail said...

Thanks, I needed to laugh!

Random Thinker said...

That was YOU in the tent next to us?

Zanthie said...

OMG! Embarrassing moments? I have PLENTY!!

(awesome post BTW)

Whenever I open my mouth something stupid comes out...

eg? Asking someone if beer coolers (or cozies) were to keep the beer cold...(I thought they were just for keeping your hand warm)

Oh, I could go on and on and on....

z.xoxo

Anonymous said...

Mine are to numerous to tell. I have spent my life apparently making an ass out of myself. But it's fun.

Betty Manousos said...

Oh Pat, I had a good laugh over that!Thanks I have sooo many embarassing moments soo far!!
Betty xx

Anonymous said...

I love the quick thinking on the camping trip!

Mike said...

I don't see why you don't have thousands of followers! Your posts are just so entertaining to me! The Elmo story was the best! I have done things like that. I have called one person to bitch about another and then realize that I am talking to the wrong person! Oops lol!

Brian Miller said...

lol. love those moments...or maybe just reliving others...smiles.

Sunny said...

OMG! You crack me up! I have had so many embarrassing moments I could write a book!
The most recent was Saturday when I went grocery shopping. I walked into the store, a lady, who I didn't know said, "Hi!" - I said "Hi!" - She said, "How are you doing?" - I said, "Fine, how are you?" - She said, "No, I won't forget the potato chips." - I said, "What? - She turned walked away and continued talking on her headset, concealed under her long hair. Damn cell phones!
Sunny :)

Rae said...

You need to write a book. Your funny stories would fill the pages and be a bestseller.

rachaelgking said...

I have to save mine up for Thursdays, but this? Is HILARIOUS.

Prizler Photography said...

Thank you for continuing to make all of us laugh!

SquirrelQueen said...

It too me awhile to stop laughing so I could type out this comment. Great stories Pat, I have had some embarrassing moments but they are boring in comparison to yours.

Carletta said...

You were right to blame Jim!
Once when I was newly married I was walking up the hill to the city bus stop (one car -somebody had to make alternate plans)when a truck with some guys drove by and whistled. Nice I thought until I realized my skirt was hiked above my pantyhose on one side.

Teresa said...

LOL - priceless! I have one in particular that would have been hugely embarrassing if my sweet husband hadn't had quick thinking.

We were in the produce aisle of the store and I leaned forward to pick up some fruit. Out came this little "burp" of gas that I didn't even know I had. I was mortified. Ron immediately said, "Excuse me! I didn't know I had gas!!" Bless him!